How ugly can a woman be? (title is quoted from shuen)

I had a really great people bashing today with shuen *grins* I sent him pics of this ultimate slut whom I hate to the core and this is the outcome of our conversation:

shuen: OMG she looks like a cadaver. she's so fucking ugly! she looks like some evil looking ugly mummy. she looks like a boar without the tusks , or those Lord of the Ring monsters without sharp teeth or fangs or anything.

me: and a hippopotamus with an extra huge and smelly mouth

shuen: anyone who has sex with her must have been intoxicated, insane or knocked unconscious.

me: they probably will wana switch off all the lites first. if they wake up at nite, they will get a cardiac arrest upon seeing her.

shuen: er i think he should put a mask on her ugly mug and say dear let's go for fancy costumes. the cheapskate way is of course, put a plastic bag over her and paste a photo of some hot babe on the plastic bag.

me: yeah and in the process suffocate her

shuen: he shld send her for plastic surgery man, just don't let the doctor do a sex change operation "i think u look better as a man. man cannot imagine anyone in bed with her, no wonder she has to give people gifts and money to make them have sex with her sheesh

me: she gota buy realy kinky lookin lingerie to help men fantasize

shuen: god NO NO NO. its bad enough that she's ugly, wearing skimpy underwear would be... man, i think Cupid will just shoot her to death.

me: well, if the lites are off and the silky nice touch of the lingerie can titillate the minds of men, why not?
lol cupid will kill himself first

shuen: er no amount of imagination can save her, she's beyond hope. i think people would say, er if you pay me this amount of money then i might consider sheesh SHE'S FUCKING UGLY.

me: mayb i shud compose a poem for her. shud i start with:
ppl say that we are god's children
coz we are beautiful
so what happened to u?
too bad i duno how to write a music score if not, i can create some kinda horror movie theme kinda song

shuen: lol write a song about her!!!! and if u get in on the radio waves MAN mmwhahahaha

me: singlish version --
when i was born, my mama told me that everyone is beautiful so why u look like that?

shuen: God smiles on all of us, that's what the pastor said so why did he laugh at you

me: perfect english version --
I never believed in being superficial but after seeing you, my world came crashing down, a wave of pity swept over me, I have decided to kill myself coz I can no longer believe in my principles

shuen: You know if Satan should come up and he sees your ugly mug the only thing he can say is
would you like to be my lientenant of fear? You are so fucking ugly you fit the bill

me: she can be a walking tool for euthanasia

shuen: well if you should be abandoned on an island with a horde of horny men who had not had sex for eons they would rather fuck a cow or a sheep or a hamster rather than FUCK YOU. If you should go to a bar for a one night stand you have to use lots of alcohol and drugs to make the poor guy FUCK YOU
You might have to hynopotise him into believing that you are Lydia the fat HKie because that's the most
you can make him believe

me: even lydia has gota pretty face coz shez got nice sharp features. the only person who would wana rip this slut apart will be jack the ripper

shuen: If you are a courtesan in the time of Jack the Ripper, he will probably look at you and laugh and say
you are not worth my time you are better killed by Men who can't stand Ugly Women

me: mayb count dracula may condescend to get close to her coz he needs blood but her blood aint sweet, young and fresh anymore

shuen: If Jesus Christ came down to die for our sins he will probably say I don't wanna die for you
you UGLY BITCH

me: lol i think she can be considered as one of the levels of hell whereby all the ghosts who committed murder in their life will have to go thru her and get scared to death

shuen: If my dog is horny and he wants someone to rub against it won't be you, you are just too ugly
he prefers a lamppost

me: if anyone wana commit suicide successfully, look for her

shuen: If a crow should chance upon her bathing the crow will attempt to die by flying towards the ground. she is just so ugly!

me: if a woodpecker sees her, the poor woodpecker would rather get its head stuck in the hole which it has bore in the tree than to see her face

shuen: heh and the tree will grow legs and run off

me: lol the tree will wither immediately and of course, the ostrich will rather bury its head for as long as it can

shuen: if she should EVER be a stripper she would be the ultimate killer the unveiling of her at some social function will be equivalent to sarin gas or just sadako

me: lol even sadako will be scared to death, sadako wud rather hide in the well or sadako may crawl back into the well if she crawls out and sees her face

shuen: heh i think the insects in The Mummy must have eaten up her face

me: lol and the insects must have died after eating her

shuen: lol ok lah enough bashing for a day, i am going offline:P u have fun posting it all up

And yes! I am having lots of fun doing this *Grins* U are welcomed to put in more contributions :) Oh man, it was really cathartic allowing our creative juices run wild. shuen, we should do more of this hehe...